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Oprah's prayer meeting for prositututes

2006/05/10

On May 8, 2006 The Oprah Winfrey Show aired an episode which purported to be all about the realities of prostitution. Lisa Ling accompanied Oklahoma City Police Department's vice squad as they conducted a sting operation at a truck stop called "Party Row." This pseudo-journalistic effort included Ms. Ling's interview of an arrested prostitute while she was handcuffed. Ling's questioning sounded more like the type of questions I have fielded from would-be clients over the years, than an earnest investigation with the prostitute's welfare in mind. Questions such as how many men have you had sex with? how old were you when you first had sex? and what do you have to do for that much money? are geared to increase television ratings but they do nothing to humanize or help the women arrested for prostitution.

A quick visit to Oprah's website reveals the true nature of the bias, stereotypes and prejudice which spawned this show. "Despite the means in which she supports herself, the woman still dreams of getting off Party Row," is just one example of the condescending tone taken in reference to the woman Lisa Ling "interviews" while handcuffed. And in that one statement is revealed an age-old attitude that prostitutes are "fallen women" who will not be "accepted" into mainstream society. The website also makes incessant references to prostitutes "selling their bodies." Based upon such archaic wording, one would doubt the sex worker rights movement had ever existed. Even the clients of prostitutes know they provide a SERVICE, that's why prostitutes are called "providers." But apparently Oprah is less sensitive to the economic and labor issues surrounding the profession of prostitution.

However, Oprah is sensitive to her own fears of angry phonecalls and emails from the wives of truck drivers. To fend off any such assault, Oprah cautiously frames her expose with the disclaimer that "not all truck drivers see prostitutes." No such qualification is offered on behalf of prostitutes. Instead we are led to believe that all prostitutes are drug addicted, miserable and ashamed. At one point, the show takes on the feel of a prayer meeting. Repeated references to feeling "dirty" and "used up" are highlighted, encouraged and applauded by Oprah and her audience. And then with Christ-like authority, Oprah declares one repentant whore forgiven and admonishes her to "do better," not unlike Jesus' admonition to "sin no more."

The nauseating self-righteous and patronizing overtones aside, Oprah does women a real disservice by pandering to the whole "sex is shameful" mentality of the religious right. And by neglecting to report on the lives of other prostitutes - men, women and transgenders who are not addicted to drugs, who are not ashamed and who choose their work freely - Oprah sets the stage for the continued abuse and marginalization of sex workers. This type of misinformation and prejudice persists even though we live in a country which has legalized prostitution in the state of Nevada. Apparently Oprah does not believe the women who work in Nevada brothels deserve to be represented or even mentioned in passing.

I believe that ALL prostitutes - male, female and transgender - deserve to have the realities of their lives validated by powerful media moguls like Oprah. When someone of her stature writes us out of existence by refusing to acknowledge our truth, her actions threaten to set back the sex worker rights movement. We demand equal air time.

Oprah's new take on sex worker rights

2006/05/08

A day in the life of a prostitute? How dare Oprah title today's show in that fashion. It would have been more truthful to say a day in the life a drug addict, a day in the life of a rape survivor, a day in the life of a teen runaway, a day in the life of a battered woman . . . . nothing was revealed that couldn't be said about many women who are addicted or have been battered or raped or molested - regardless of how they make a living.

While Oprah took great pains to tell us that "not all truck drivers see prostitutes," she didn't take the same approach with her sensational expose on a narrow aspect of the prostitution profession. Not one mention of other prostitute's experiences. Quite the contrary, she goes to great lengths to generalize her pseudo-science to all prostitution. "Nothing Glamorous about Prostitution" Oprah warns.

"They have just used me up so much. They turned me into a nothing" says one properly contrite and reformed prostitute. And the audience applauds her self-loathing and shame.

Oprah asks her if she "still feels dirty." Then she takes the woman in her arms and tells her "she knows better so she will do better." Her patronizing attitude lays against my skin like self-righteous slime. Especially against the backdrop of all the gratuitous "journalism" relentlessly probing for the titillating details which will sell Oprah's show - how many clients a day did you have sex with? How much did you get paid? What did you have to do for the money? How old were you when you first had sex? How many men have you had sex with?

Well Oprah has come a long way from a show she did years ago when she profiled Marianne Macy's Working Sex: An Odyssey into Our Cultural Underworld. At that time Oprah actually encouraged her entire studio audience to applaud in favor of legalizing prostitution. I can't help but wonder what has poisoned her mind in the intervening years.

So this angry abolitionist started sending me emails. She refused to say who she is beyond the name she gave. But as I grew to know her better through her hateful emails, it became apparent that this woman is not a sex worker. Rather she loves to quote statistics. I guess she has read about my profession. And when faced with the opportunity to speak to a real live whore, she would rather beat that whore over the head with her statistics than listen to the voice and experience and feelings of one prostitute woman. My fourteen years as a sex worker, the fact that I was evicted as a prostitute, that I went to jail on prostitution charges and that I was raped by a serial rapist who preys upon prostitutes means nothing to her. I am not one of the unfortunate women she wishes to help. I am the enemy simply because I disagree with her and her books and her tired statistics.

So to all the hateful abolitionists who cannot find an ounce of compassion in their cold hearts I have this to say: I hear you when you speak about being raped. I hear you when you cry out for help. I hear you when you tell me that prostitution was the worst thing that ever happened to you. And I believe you. Now please hear me when I speak from my heart and my experience. If prostitution is my chosen profession, respect that. Don't try to silence my voice because I disagree with you about how to help women and how to protect prostitutes. We are sisters and we both want women to be safe.

And to the analytical academics who like to study whores as if we were rats in a cage, I have this to say: Did you really expect the prostitute to agree with you? Did you expect us to spout academic hyperbole and trot out statistical data? We are whores. We do what you read about. We don't need to study it. We are it. And someday our voice will count. Until our voices count with you, you have no right to claim concern for whores. Now show me you mean what you say when you say you want to help prostitutes. Stop trying to discredit and hurt those few prostitutes who actually have the courage to come forward and speak out publicly. Recognize as human. And grant us the dignity to speak for ourselves.

Veronica Monet