Radical Vixen

Panty Tree had been planning our session for months. (For the origin of his nickname read this blog post.) Twice he had set a date, made travel arrangements and canceled at the last minute. After the second time I assumed we’d never meet. The session talk was just a fantasy, one we’d relieve hundreds of time on the phone but never in reality. This was fine by me-many of my callers having been doing this routine for years.

When PT asked if we could schedule a third time I told him he’d have to make a deposit. He suggested prepaying for the entire session. He also wanted a second mistress for the session and suggested prepaying her as well. I agreed.

Over the several months Panty Tree paid me and the second mistress (a friend I’ll nickname Second Mistress and laugh at my silliness) in little bits of cash. During our phone calls he’d plan out the sessions endlessly. Every detail was examined and re-examined. Repeatedly he’d tell me of his excitement and nervousness.

The slow but steady prepayment and his endless rehashing gave the upcoming session a heavy sense of foreboding. Could one session live up to PT’s panty obsessions? From our phone conversations I sensed he was placing a huge amount of importance on our meeting.

The day of our session came and still I was doubtful we’d meet. I had my session bag in the car just in case but otherwise went about my day as normal. SM and I hung out together and procrastinated about putting on make-up and doing our hair. An hour before the designated time PT called. He was in town and had checked into his hotel. Game on!

SM and I got dressed, put on make-up and did our hair in a local coffee shop. We had two outfits which is typical for this type of arrangement. When meeting a client at his hotel I dress in my “librarian garb” to get past hotel staff without raising eyebrows. (Librarian garb consists of flattering but not revealing blouse, long flowing skirt, wedge heels and normal make-up. My goal is to look cute but not memorable.)

Panty Tree opened his hotel door let us in. He instantly reminded me of an ex-boyfriend’s father. Imagine a Baptist preacher but make him incredibly shy and you have PT.

PT brought a large portion of his panty collection. His used panty collection. His used panty collection that were quite stained. I’m very anal retentive when it comes to sessions. Though I only do domination I sanitize every toy I use afterwards. If I spank a client over my knee I make sure to wash my legs after he walks out the door. I border on being a hypochondriac at times and seeing PT’s pile of used panties squicked me out.

Panty Tree lived up to his nickname. Picking up a pair from his collection he looked at me. “I’ve never done this in front of a person before” he said while he hands shook. I assured him it was alright. SM and I watched in silence as he draped the panties over his body. By tying the elastic bands together he made a sort of pantie cocoon around his body.

He kept saying how nervous and excited he was to be showing off. He was shaking the whole time. After his panty cocoon was complete he turned to face me. “How do I look Mistress” he asked. There were tears in his eyes that he tried to nonchalantly wipe away.

In reality he looked gross. A hunched old man who didn’t take care of his skin draped in old stained panties is what he really looked like. But I wasn’t there to tell him the truth. I was there to show compassion. As I sized him up I thought to myself “I will never feel shame for being a sex worker.” To Panty Tree I put on my flirtatious smile and told him he looked like a sexy slut.

Seeing Panty Tree’s vulnerability made me realize the value of my work. I was there to fulfill his fantasy yes. But I was also there to validate him as a person and to validate his desires.

Despite the fetish theme the session felt more like therapy than domination. Over and over PT would ask if it was ok to have a panty fetish. I assured him it was alright. “Am I a bad person for liking panties?” PT asked repeatedly. I told him he was a good person. If he hadn’t been covered in dirty panties I would have hugged him.

I’ve talked to PT several times since this session. Each time he thanks me profusely. I like it when clients say thank you; it’s a nice touch. No one has ever thanked me as many times as Panty Tree has. Originally I was concerned SM and I couldn’t live up to his expectations. But PT has made it very clear that we fulfilled him more than he thought possible. After telling my friend Sera about the session she commented “Wow. You made his life.”

I was struck by how much compassion was in this session. PT needed acceptance and assurance that it was ok to have a dirty panty fetish. He needed to show off in front of someone who was understanding and caring. This session inspired my new series Sex Work And Compassion.

Most of the time my work is just that-work. We talk, I fulfill a fantasy and if I’m lucky I get some good blog material. That’s fine because it’s the nature of the work. But there are a handful of clients that go beyond the normal routine. I’ve done sessions where the clients were so vulnerable. Their need for compassion has come in many forms-talking, pleading, crying, confessing. These are the calls that are about more than just getting off. They feel more like a therapy session than phone sex. Clients work through sexual issues, sexual guilt, sexual abuse, relationship problems, midlife crises and more.

These are the clients that show me the importance of sex work. All to often I read media stories that portray us as little better than trash. We are accused of being immoral, abused, neglected, drug addicted, worthless sex workers. We are not worthless. We are a vital part of society. There are those that need our help and need the kind of therapy that only a sex worker can provide. Sessions like Panty Tree’s prove to me that our work is immensely valuable. This series will explore the compassion I’ve found in my work.

Generally I don’t find smoking sexy. But there are some exceptions, this picture from Martha’s Girls being one one them.

Thanks to A Nawty Mouz who pointed out that the Sugasm is back up. And thanks to Sam who incurred quite the headache fixing it behind the scenes.

Sugasm submitters can submit their posts here. If the site stays stable Sugasm #144 should be up sometime next week.

If you haven’t read about Catalina’s raffle I suggest checking it out.

Originally Catalina needed to raise funds for her daughter’s tuition because some asshats were messing with her. The full story can be read here.

It’s incredibly cool that Catalina set this up as a raffle-a help me and I’ll help you with sexy gifts situation. But it’s also heartwarming to watch the kink community rally around her. She’s raised the money she needed and the extra is being donated to the National Coalition for Sexual Freedom. Watching the outpouring of suport makes me feel all warm and fuzzy.

The raffle prize list is pretty impressive. You can read the list here. (I’m donating two books-She’s On Top and Sex And Bacon if you’re interested.)

With the mainstream press going apeshit over John Edwards’ affair and Olympic fervor there doesn’t seem to be nearly enough about the Russian Georgia War. I feel like I’m still catching up on the history of Russian/Georgian relations while the war stories are flying by. Here’s some links I’ve been reading:

From Wired’s blog:
Did the U.S. Prep Georgia for War with Russia?
“Georgia and Russia are careening towards war. And the U.S. isn’t exactly a detached observer in the fight. The American military has been training and equipping Georgian troops for years.

The news thus far: Georgia, which has been locked in a drone war over the separatist enclave of Abkhazia, has launched an offensive to reclaim another breakaway territory, South Ossetia. Latest reports indicate that Georgian forces are laying siege to Tskhinvali, the South Ossetian capital. And Russia, which has backed the separatists, is sending in the tanks.

So why should we care? Oh, just the prospect of a larger regional war that could drag in Russia – and involve the United States as well. Since early 2002, the U.S. government has given a healthy amount of military aid to Georgia. When I last visited South Ossetia, Georgian troops manned a checkpoint outside Tskhinvali — decked out in surplus U.S. Army uniforms and new body armor. ”

This story has one of the best reader comments I’ve read:
“Stagflation, record energy prices, a powerful Russia and proxy wars!
HAPPY TIMES ARE HERE AGAIN!
There’s even an actor governing California.. GIVE IT TIME!”

From Antiwar.com:
Georgian invasion of South Ossetia sets the stage for a wider war
“The anti-Russian bias of the Western media is really something to behold: “Russia Invades Georgia,” “Russia Attacks Georgia,” and variations thereof have been some of the choice headlines reporting events in the Caucasus, but the reality is not only quite different, but the exact opposite. Sometimes this comes out in the third or fourth paragraph of the reportage, in which it is admitted that the Georgians tried to “retake” the “breakaway province” of South Ossetia. The Georgian bombing campaign and the civilian casualties – if they are mentioned at all – are downplayed and presented as subject to dispute.

(snip)

That’s what Western reporters aren’t telling their readers: the South Ossetians (and the Abkhazians) have had de facto independence since 1991, when they rose up against their “democratic” central government, which had banned regional parties from participating in elections. They beat back the Georgian army, which, nonetheless, inflicted a lot of casualties and damage. A low-level war has been in progress ever since, with Saakashvili and his ultra-nationalist party using the rebels as a foil to divert attention from their repressive domestic policies and Georgia’s sad status as an economic basket case.”

From Russia Today:
US hampering Russian peace efforts – Putin
“The Prime Minister has accused Washington of undermining Russia’s attempts to restore peace in the South Ossetian conflict zone. Vladimir Putin said a decision by the US military to fly 800 Georgian soldiers from Iraq to Georgia showed America was ‘trying to get in the way’.

(snip)

Putin also accused the West of double standards when it comes to judging war crimes.

“As we all know, Saddam Hussein was hanged for burning down several Shiite villages. But now suddenly the situation is different. The Georgian leaders who in a matter of hours wiped out ten Ossetian villages, who ran over children and the elderly with tanks, who burned civilians alive, those people have to be protected,” he said.

Meanwhile, American Joe Mestas, who witnessed days of shelling, has said U.S. and Georgian leaders are responsible for the violence that has killed 2,000 people in the region. He told RT that Washington will have to answer for the violence.”

From Stratfor:
The Russo-Georgian War and the Balance of Power
“The United States is Georgia’s closest ally. It maintained about 130 military advisers in Georgia, along with civilian advisers, contractors involved in all aspects of the Georgian government and people doing business in Georgia. It is inconceivable that the Americans were unaware of Georgia’s mobilization and intentions. It is also inconceivable that the Americans were unaware that the Russians had deployed substantial forces on the South Ossetian frontier. U.S. technical intelligence, from satellite imagery and signals intelligence to unmanned aerial vehicles, could not miss the fact that thousands of Russian troops were moving to forward positions. The Russians clearly knew the Georgians were ready to move. How could the United States not be aware of the Russians? Indeed, given the posture of Russian troops, how could intelligence analysts have missed the possibility that the Russians had laid a trap, hoping for a Georgian invasion to justify its own counterattack?

It is very difficult to imagine that the Georgians launched their attack against U.S. wishes. The Georgians rely on the United States, and they were in no position to defy it. This leaves two possibilities. The first is a massive breakdown in intelligence, in which the United States either was unaware of the existence of Russian forces, or knew of the Russian forces but — along with the Georgians — miscalculated Russia’s intentions. The second is that the United States, along with other countries, has viewed Russia through the prism of the 1990s, when the Russian military was in shambles and the Russian government was paralyzed. The United States has not seen Russia make a decisive military move beyond its borders since the Afghan war of the 1970s-1980s. The Russians had systematically avoided such moves for years. The United States had assumed that the Russians would not risk the consequences of an invasion.”

Have you read some Russia/Georgia news that you think was particularly informative or insightful? Please share links in the comments.

From Info Wars:
Attorney: ‘DC Madam’ left instructions if ‘ever found dead of apparent suicide’
“Exclusive: Citizens For Legitimate Government has learned that Deborah Jeane Palfrey’s lawyer, Montgomery Blair Sibley, has intervened to stop a lawsuit seeking to prevent the Tarpon Springs, Florida, Police Department from releasing information requested by Sibley pertaining to the investigation of Jeane’s death.

(snip)

Citing his obligation to discharge explicit instructions from his former client, Jeane Palfrey, the so-called DC Madam, to “fully investigate and reveal the circumstances of her death if deemed a suicide by authorities,” her attorney, Montgomery Blair Sibley, has moved to intervene in a lawsuit filed by Jeane’s mother, Blanche Palfrey. That lawsuit seeks to prevent the Tarpon Springs, Florida Police Department from releasing information requested by Sibley pertaining the investigation of Jeane’s death on May 1 of this year.

Sibley said, “While I don’t mean to cause Jeane’s family additional grief, an attorney’s first duty is to his client, and Jeane was very clear with me that if she was ever found dead of an apparent suicide, I was to make sure that all the evidence was publicly disseminated so that it could be independently evaluated.”"

—

When Mr. Radical sent me this link the first thing I said was “Holy shit!” Palfrey left instructions in case she died of an apparent suicide?! In my mind that’s more indication of foul play.

But why would her mother try to stop this information from becoming public? Does she really believe Palfrey killed herself? She’s told the media that her daughter did not appear suicidal before her death. (The ultra paranoid in me wonders if she fears for her other daughters life but I’ll let that tin foil hat theory go for now.)

I’m impressed by Sibley. He doesn’t have to do this-certainly no ones paying his legal fees. This is a gritty side of activism work-working through the long and slow legal system.

If the information is released to the public you know I’ll be reading (and blogging about) it.

“I want to eat out of your ass for the rest of my life.”
-relatively new client

Some Sugasm submitters have emailed me asking why the Sugasm is down. Thanks for the heads up-I’m taking a week off from editing and hadn’t realized the site went down.

I’m not sure what’s going on. I’ve emailed Sam and will let everyone know what’s up as soon as I find out.

Recently a client asked me to make him a golden shower film. He wanted me to film myself peeing in several different locations. Recently I took a long hike in the woods to film some scenes. Not only did I get good footage I also got a good lesson in filming fetish films. Here’s some tips I learned.

Do:
Film scenes in the deep woods so you’ll be alone and it’ll seem edgy since you’re doing a fetish shoot outside.

Don’t:
Don’t bring a flash of tequila to drink thinking alcohol makes you pee faster. While you will pee more the alcohol will also make you stumble as you hike back to the trail head.

Do:
Bring your dog along since he likes to go hiking. He also serves as security since you are out in the woods alone filming fetish scenes.

Don’t:
Don’t let the dog roam on his own while filming the pee scene lest the dog come over to see what his owner is doing. Stopping a pee flow while shooing away a dog while trying not to piss on said dog is practically impossible. It also makes the editor’s job a nightmare since he has to edit out the dog shooing scene.

Do:
Drink water while hiking to film location. This insures a full bladder when filming begins.

Don’t:
Don’t wait until your bladder is about to burst to stop hiking and set up the camera. If you do you will be setting up a tripod and video camera while hopping around with your legs crossed. It is likely your bladder will burst before the camera is recording and by the time you actually hit “record” you’ll be halfway through and your thighs will be wet.

Do:
Take the camera into private public bathrooms to film yourself peeing. The angle is an extreme close-up but the client will love the footage.

Don’t:
Don’t be too embarrassed to ask your husband (or partner or friend) to film you peeing. It’s not anything he (or she) hasn’t seen before and you’ll save tons of time since you won’t have to position and reposition the camera.

Do:
Position the camera close enough so that your golden nectar stream shows up on film.

Don’t:
Don’t position said camera so close to your genitals that you actually pee on the camera.

Follow my tips and you’ll have less drama filming your homemade videos.

From Planned Parenthood:
Planned Parenthood: Proposed HHS Rule Would Compromise Women’s Health Care
“Statement from Cecile Richards, President of Planned Parenthood Federation of America, responding to a New York Times story that the Bush administration is considering a new HHS rule that would compromise women’s access to health care and information.

“Planned Parenthood is gravely concerned that the Bush administration is days away from an attack on women’s health care that would limit the rights of patients to receive complete and accurate health information and services. At a time when more and more families are uninsured and under economic assault, we find our health care system is in crisis and our president taking steps to deny access to basic care.

“This proposed rule will put women’s access to birth control and the information they need to make health care decisions at risk. The proposed rule will radically redefine abortion to include some of the most common and effective methods of birth control. As a result, women’s ability to manage their own health care is at risk of being compromised by politics and ideology.

“As one of the leading women’s health care providers and advocates, Planned Parenthood will not stand by and watch the Bush administration deny quality, affordable health care and accurate information to millions of women.””

Planned Parenthood has more info here.

The New York Times story mentioned:
Abortion Proposal Sets Condition on Aid
“The Bush administration wants to require all recipients of aid under federal health programs to certify that they will not refuse to hire nurses and other providers who object to abortion and even certain types of birth control.

Under the draft of a proposed rule, hospitals, clinics, researchers and medical schools would have to sign “written certifications” as a prerequisite to getting money under any program run by the Department of Health and Human Services.

Such certification would also be required of state and local governments, forbidden to discriminate, in areas like grant-making, against hospitals and other institutions that have policies against providing abortion.”

—

I’d like to say that surely this wouldn’t happen. But considering Bush’s disregard for the Constitution and laws of this country this news doesn’t shock me. It pisses me off sure but does it surprise me? Sadly, no.

The best of this week’s blogs by the bloggers who blog them. Highlighting the top 3 posts as chosen by Sugasm participants. Want in Sugasm #144? Submit a link to your best post of the week using this form. Participants, repost the link list within a week and you’re all set.

This Week’s Picks
Anti-Porn Protest Gets Weird
“People get very excited about their causes and lack the sense to see if the information backs them up. ”

The Come Shot
“You don’t see their bodies going blotchily red and hear them howling like a banshee.”

Third Time’s a Charm
“If I lift my kilt on Bourbon Street I’m much more likely to get arrested than if Elizabeth takes off her top.”

Mr. Sugasm Himself
Sugar Bank

Editor’s Choice
In My Office

More Sugasm
Join the Sugasm

See also: Fleshbot’s Sex Blog Roundup each Tuesday and Friday.

HNT courtesy of No need to be coy.

The new blog Best Sex Bloggers has recently been launched and I’m happy to say that I’m part of the project. So if you can’t get enough of my writing look for me over there.

From BSB:
“Bestsexbloggers.com is a collaborative effort between erotic, glamour, and fetish photographers and the best sex bloggers of every flavor. Represented here are BDSM, D/s, Doms, Dommes, Professional Sex Work, Polyamory, Vanilla, Psychology, Sexuality, Reviews, Advice, HNT, Queer, Gay, Lesbian, Pansexual, and of course hot erotic fiction as well as the even hotter tales of adventure.”

From KY3:
Injured teen sees no reason police used stun gun 19 times on him
“A teenager from Branson who was hit with an electric stun gun 19 times by police has recovered enough to do an interview with a reporter.

Ozark police found Mace Hutchinson on July 19 underneath the Highway F overpass over U.S. 65. Mace’s family says he broke his back in a fall off the bridge. When he wouldn’t move, police repeatedly used an electric stun gun on him.

Mace says he doesn’t remember much about that night and there are still several unanswered questions about how Mace ended up under the bridge. But what he is able to say is he believes there was no good reason why anyone in his situation would be stunned 19 times. He hopes the police officers are held accountable.”

(snip)

“His family says what made his situation worse is that his surgery had to be postponed because he had been stunned by Ozark police 19 times.”

—

Seriously, what the fuck is up with this situation? I cannot believe that a person with a broken back would be able to cuss out cops. The cynic in me wonders how hard the cops wrists will be slapped. Will they be slightly rubbed while being sternly told not to do it again? Or will they be smartly slapped once on the wrist and then sent on paid leave until the controversy blows over? The optimist in me says let’s keep on an eye on this story. If justice needs to happen perhaps public outcry will make it happen.

I’m slammed on the phone so that means there’s no time to blog. While I work on a new sex worker series I’ll give you this interesting quote:

“I worship at the church of your ass. When I pray and eat from your ass that’s my communion.”
-new client

Lately I’ve had either sissy, scat or sacrilegious calls. This week I had a call that combined all three.

I’m serious. Bushy eyebrows are damn sexy.

I’d like to see more hairy men in porn. I’d also like to see models in handknits. Ok, I know they need to get naked fast for the shoot. But they could start off in handknit socks. Give me male porn with guys with long hair, bushy eyebrows, hairy chests and handknit socks with occasional outdoor scenes! I would so sign up to a site that gave me all that.

In the meantime I’ll enjoy this gallery.

From the Seattle Times:
Ted Stevens indicted, longest-serving GOP senator
“Sen. Ted Stevens, the longest-serving Republican senator and a figure in Alaska politics since before statehood, was indicted today on seven counts of failing to disclose thousands of dollars in services he received from a company that helped renovate and maintain his home.”

(snip)

“Prosecutors said Stevens received more than $250,000 in gifts and services from VECO CORP, a powerful oil services contractor, and its executives. From May 1999 to August 2007, prosecutors said, the 84-year-old senator concealed “his continuing receipt of hundreds of thousands of dollars worth of things of value from a private corporation.”

Stevens has adamantly denied any wrongdoing.

In a prepared statement on his Web site today, Stevens wrote:

“I have proudly served this nation and Alaska for over 50 years. My public service began when I served in World War II. It saddens me to learn that these charges have been brought against me. I have never knowingly submitted a false disclosure form required by law as a U.S. Senator.”"

—

Erm, I highly doubt Stevens was the one who wrote that quote on his website. Especially after his “it’s a series of tubes” statements. (Whenever we have internet problems Mr. Radical and I comment that the tubes are down.)

In case you missed the laugh or cry because the leaders of our country are so stupid moment, click here for more details.

The best of this week’s blogs by the bloggers who blog them. Highlighting the top 3 posts as chosen by Sugasm participants. Want in Sugasm #143? Submit a link to your best post of the week using this form. Participants, repost the link list within a week and you’re all set.

This Week’s Picks
Interludes - part 3
“He winds the rope around his hands, smoothing the kinks, and I stand there, breathing a little faster, conscious of all those eyes upon me.”

Hurts So Good
“I want you to wear the badges of sweet distress for days.”

Shower fantasy
“You don’t want to admit it, but you want me.”

Mr. Sugasm Himself
Sugar Bank

Editor’s Choice
Why I haven’t blogged about the Mosley case

More Sugasm
Join the Sugasm

See also: Fleshbot’s Sex Blog Roundup each Tuesday and Friday.

Brittany Fuchs courtesy of Badgirls Hotbox.

“It can’t be lost lost. How does one lose a dildo really?”
-Sissy Nanette
He was right since he found it a few minutes after saying the above.

From North Jersey:
Lab tech admits to having sex with corpse
“A former lab technician admitted Monday that he had sex with a corpse last year at Holy Name Hospital in Teaneck.

Anthony Merino, 25, said that he was working at the hospital on Oct. 28 and went to the morgue in the basement, where he unzipped a body bag. Authorities said the body bag contained the remains of a 92-year-old woman.

“Did there come a time when you took your pants off and sexually penetrated the human body?” defense attorney Savyon Grant asked Merino.

“Yes,” Merino said.”

—

My original post can be read here.

From Everything Jersey:
Assemblyman Neil Cohen under child porn investigation
“Deputy Assembly Speaker Neil Cohen is being investigated for alleged possession of child pornography, according to two of his Democratic colleagues who said they brought the matter to the attention of law enforcement.

In a joint statement, Sen. Raymond Lesniak and Assemblyman Joseph Cryan (both D-Union) confirmed they alerted authorities to the possibility Cohen (D-Union) had child pornography on his computers.”

(snip)

“Among the more than 100 laws Cohen has sponsored is one that created a 24-hour hotline for members of the public to report computer crimes, including child pornography. He also co-sponsored a law that retroactively removed immunity from churches, schools and other charities that negligently hire employees who sexually abuse children.”